This is about packing

As I sit in a pile of clothes, wondering which cute outfit to wow the denizens of NYC for my upcoming weekend trip, I thought what better way to procrastinate than to write a long overdue blog post. And here we go.
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Glam’s Packing Tips

  • Always bring one outfit that you can wear to a nice dinner out. Unless you’re going to the cottage. But for everything else, even if you don’t go out for a proper meal, you can still look like more than a sweaty tourist in your running shoes and yoga pants. Just because you’re a visitor to a place doesn’t mean you can’t add to the glamscape of it.
  • Towels. Always remember to bring a towel. This is almost always the first thing I forget to pack and the one I regret the most, because honestly, you can buy anything else you forget, but shelling out money for a towel you don’t need is akin to having your hair set on fire. Just awful.
  • Pack your undies at the bottom of your bag because there’s nothing more embarrassing than opening your bag at your destination and having your unmentionables bust out in front of your host.
  • Either bring your makeup on your carry-on or make sure powders, eye shadows, blushes, basically anything that’s fragile, is safely smooshed by towels (the ones that you didn’t forget) or other big, fluffy things so that it absorbs the shaking that air travel is associated with. Whatever you do, don’t let it just roll around willy-nilly because that shit will crack if not completely break. In the same vein, make sure that your makeup and anything that contains spillables is properly sealed in plastic or in a separate container, because you will hate your life if that stuff not only breaks but gets all over your clothing.
  • Always pack 2 extra pairs of undies than you think you need. You never know when VPL (visible panty line) is gonna rear its ugly head under your super cute outfit that you don’t have the luxury of changing and you don’t want that to dampen your hotness. Also you never know when you’ll bump into LL Cool J, and it’d be super embarrassing not to have an extra pair after the ones you were wearing exploded straight into space out of excitement and lust.
  • If you don’t wanna waste space in your luggage with your huge bottles of Joico shampoo that you bought from Shoppers because they were randomly on sale for more than half of what they cost, just pop by the drug store of wherever you’re visiting and get a traveller’s size of 2 in 1 shampoo or better yet… the holy grail of all lazy glamazons… DRY SHAMPOO. Don’t think. Just buy. If you’re going for less than 4 days? WHY BOTHER WASH YOUR HAIR?! Just dust the shit out of your hair with dry shampoo, throw it in a glamour bun, and then spray your perfume on your hair and no one is the wiser.
  • Bring perfume or some other body odour deterrent/masking agent so no one can tell how little you’ve washed your hair. Glam can sometimes also be the art of masking questionable hygiene choices. Not often, but occasionally… I just… Shut up. Don’t look at me.
  • Bring deodorant in your purse, not your luggage. If you’re gonna be doing a lot of sight seeing and walking and it’s the summer time and you’re wearing a skirt or dress and you’re NOT one of those hos who’s thighs don’t meet at the top of their legs (fuck those girls), you are gonna be experiencing some MAD friction. Instead of drying your thighs with baby powder, which isn’t that effective because they’re just gonna re-sweat it up anyway, apply the deodorant to the inner thighs and you’ll be as lubricated as a porn star at work. Try to get deodorant that’s not chalky or applies white so it doesn’t look like a clown went to town on your lady gents, you know what I’m saying?
  • Think of all the outfits that you think you’re gonna need (not undies, actual outfits), and then take away 2 outfits. There is always ALWAYS shit you don’t end up wearing and it’s just taking up space. For a stay of 3-4 days, 1 pair of pants and another type of bottom is all you’ll wear, no matter what. Change up your outfits with accessories, which take up way less room.
  • Don’t bother bringing a makeup remover bottle and then cotton. Just get makeup wipes which are readily available everywhere. That way there’s less space being used and less risk of a bottle bursting in your luggage and, as previously stated, ruining your ENTIRE LIFE.

 

Happy travels!

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